4 + 1 = 5 in the family: The Addition of Baby C

May 25, 2015 brought the addition of our youngest munchkin, baby C.

This beautiful little guy is my VBA2C. Y'all, it was amazing, but before I get into it let me give you a little background to the other two births.

Birth #1: R was born June 24. It was June 23, I was 39 weeks, and I had gained almost 25 pounds of water weight in the past two weeks of my pregnancy. For almost 3 weeks I had been suffering from PUPPPs (pruritic uticarial papules and plagues of pregnancy), or for those who need a better idea: HELL. I was losing my mind. I walked in to my OB appointment that day, and the nurse took one look at me and said, "Oh, honey." You know it's bad when that happens. I begged the doctor for meds, a bullet, anything for relief. He offered to induce me even though I wasn't dilated or effaced at all. In my crazed state I accepted. I feel like I should put here that I wish I had done more research, known more about natural alternatives, and had better support. All the calls were made, parents were called, and mom made her way up. We went our for a last meal, and I ate light. I tried to sleep until it was time for us to go in, but that did not happen. At midnight we made our way up to the hospital. Come to find out our best friends were at the hospital preparing to meet their little girl! After getting checked in they came in and got me hooked up to fluids, monitor, and inserted the tab. They gave me some Benadryl to help with the itching (it didn't, btw. Only made me super dizzy and sleepy.) My water broke at some point in the night, and they started Pitocin the next morning. Not knowing enough I just left it all to the professionals. It ended up that I went from mild contractions to coupling contractions in a matter of a couple of hours. It was exhausting, frightening, and overwhelming. I got an epidural, and passed out. Family came in and out through out the day, and I couldn't feel a thing. At some point that afternoon (on the 24th) the doctor came in and said that we needed to have a c-section. I remember not being checked at all, all I remember is that they said the baby was stressed. They whisked me out, got M ready, and in about 20 minutes R was born by c-section. Getting him out was uncomfortable. The doctor was almost straddling me to pull him out. I was exhausted, and M was sick. It was not an ideal situation. I got to see him momentarily, and then he and M went to the nursery while I was sewn up and taken to recovery. I was in recovery for almost 2 hours, and then taken to my room. They brought baby R out for me to hold him a little bit, and then they took him back to the nursery. I kept asking for him every few hours as I wanted to start breastfeeding. Every time I asked for him I got the response of, "Oh, you need to rest!" Right after I would pass out because I was so exhausted. 8 hours later I finally got my baby. We struggled to feed, but we eventually got nursing started. That was the worst recovery emotionally and physically, and I didn't realize until a few years later how much the whole ordeal had affected me.

Baby R, shortly after delivery

Birth #2: L

A few years later we were ready to welcome our second baby boy, L. I had tried to talk VBAC with the doctor and hospital where we were, but neither were open and the closest hospital that did was about 2 hours with potentially TERRIBLE traffic. So, we planned on a relaxed and much happier repeat c-section.This pregnancy flew by with minimal complications other than a separating pubic bone (holy moly, painful!). I worked all the way up to the day before my delivery date. I got off about an hour early on Thursday, and headed home. My mom had made her way up to watch R while we were at the hospital the next day. We all went out to eat at our favorite restaurant, and I had a favorite, the club (noms). M and I got up the next morning uber early and headed to the hospital. Checked in, fluids started, and waited. And waited. Slept. Watched a show. And slept some more. Finally, it was time! They took me into the OR and it was a completely different atmosphere! Everyone was happy, music was going, and everyone was so chatty! We were having a baby! After getting started, they brought M in to sit next to me. At some point I started feeling very heavy in my chest, and M started praying over me which brought me to a calmer center and I was able to breathe better. Soon, it was time to deliver, and I was able to watch our OB deliver our next baby boy, L! M went up with him to the nursery while they finished with me. I did have to go to recovery but only for about 30 minutes, and then after getting taken to my room, they brought the baby right to me. Recovery after this surgery was SO much easier, and I am so thankful for that.

Baby L, after his bath

All of this, accumulates to me doing a ton of research, and finding out more about VBACs, VBA2Cs, and doulas. We needed the right support team, and I needed to have all of my research together for our next baby. Shortly after finding out we were pregnant with baby # 3, I immediately started researching OB's who would possibly be supportive of a VBA2C. The same name kept popping up, and we booked our first appointment with him. A friend that I had been working out with was a doula, and highly recommended him. I came in prepared with all of my research, the diet I was mostly following, how I was working out, and that I planned to use a doula. Needless to say, we didn't hit many road blocks with him, and the pregnancy went incredibly well! We got established with our doula, and we prayed over this pregnancy and delivery. It came closer to delivery time, and I refused to be checked. I honestly told my OB that I didn't want to be checked because I would either be dilated a little, and could go a while. Or I wouldn't be dilated at all and would be super disappointed. I needed to be positive. He was completely supportive. At 40 weeks, he asked if we could check then, and I agreed. I was 50% effaced and 1 cm dilated! We discussed what could happen over the next couple of weeks, and what my options would be as far as getting this baby to come. I really wanted everything as natural as possible, and was very against pitocin. I asked him to do a membrane sweep just to see if it would help get things going. All the rest of the week I had Braxton Hicks, and then eventually I started prodromal labor. It was frustrating, exhausting, and draining emotionally. My mother-in-law came up to help, and it was a heavenly. If I needed to go pray or rest, I could. If I needed to sleep, I could. My father-in-law came up that Friday to spend some time with all of us...and wait for baby to come. We all were waiting for baby to come.

On that Friday, we were devastated to learn that some friends from our last church had delivered their baby girl. She had gone to be with our Lord earlier that time. I was broken for them. I couldn't fathom how anything like that could happen. Then they shared their immense vulnerability and trust in the grace of God. How our children are not our own, but they are God's. I was floored, and my selfish world was changed for the better.

All weekend we prayed over this delivery, spent time with family, and spent time in the Word. We prayed for our friends. Sunday marked 41 weeks, and I had decided that I was just going to be pregnant till 42 weeks. My in-laws went home to try and get some rest before heading back to work the next day. M and I got our two big boys to bed, and we also went to bed. About 3:00 am I woke up feeling weird, not having contractions, just weird. I decided to take a shower to see if it would help me relax. I got out of the shower, and my contractions started...hard. This was it! I walked to the room and sat on my exercise ball and worked through them. I woke M up and told him to go take a shower. He very groggily agreed, and then after came back and tried to go to sleep. At this point I knew it was time, but he was clueless. After waking him up, I got him to go pick up the living room, because that's where I planned to labor, and to also make sure the bag was together. I eventually called our doula, and talked to her for a while. After having a couple contractions while on the phone with her she said she was going to get ready, and check back in after a little while.

The next little bit is kind of a blur. I walked, I drank coconut water with himalayan salt, and I nibbled on some larabar. M had called his mom and told her to come back as she lived 3 hours away. At this point I was focusing pretty hard on the contractions. Our doula texted to see how it was going and at this point I managed to text a one-word response, "Come." She headed out, and I headed outside. I was feeling claustrophobic inside. The outside was cool, and I was able to walk in nature. Michael was a great support, and was able to help me communicate my needs. He called a friend to come help with the boys since his mom wasn't there yet.

I tried to go back inside to labor, but I couldn't stand it so we stayed outside. The boys started stirring so M headed in to get them settled with some breakfast, and to make sure our stuff was together. I decided to try and go to the restroom. As soon as I sat down on the toilet my body started pushing. That was really the first time I felt panicky. I called out to M and my doula, and she very calmly looked at me and said that we would just start making our way to the hospital (only a mile away). M pulled the car around and it took me a good while to get out to the car and in as my contractions were coming pretty quickly at this point.

We finally pulled up to the hospital and parked. At this point, I had decided that I was going to walk from the parking lot all the way to L&D. We got into the lobby, and realized that we didn't have a physical copy of my birth plan. While M ran out to the car, I labored with our doula. This is the point where she and I had to urgently push some off duty nurses away. They wanted to get me a wheelchair, but I had already made up my mind to walk. After several times of C saying I was ok, I think I finally turned around and said that I was just fine. There might have been a psycho preggo lady face in the mix. M got back in and we made our way to L&D. It honestly wasn't that far, but it sure felt like it with how fast my contractions were coming.

I finally got checked in, and they said they HAD to check me in triage. I'm fairly certain I heard my doula tell the nurses as I was dropping my drawers and maneuvering my laboring body into a position I did not want to be in, that they should call the OB. There may have been a reply of, "No, we'll check her first," then a, "Oh, you're fully dilated and your bags are intact!" Then there was a sense of urgency from the nurses and a parting of the Red Sea as one nurse went to call the OB on call (mine was out of town), one to get the L&D room ready, and one to help me get some form of a robe around me. I got off the table and started to make my way to the room. Halfway down the hall I had a massive contraction. I grabbed the handrail in the hall and squatted.My body was bearing down, and my bags exploded. You know all the books say that most of the time it's a slow trickle. Not this. I had a movie-style, water-balloon popping explosion. I really wanted to stay there, and a nurse came out to inform me that I REALLY could not have a baby in the hall of the hospital. I realized at that point that I could not stand up by myself at that point. M and our doula grabbed me by each arm and helped me the rest of the way to the delivery room.

I got managed to get up on the bed, and decided I wanted to stay on my knees facing the back of the bed. They did a handheld monitor to check on baby, and somehow managed to get a hep-lock in while I was pushing. Shortly after the OB came in and asked me to go to my side, which I promptly ignored him. I was not moving from this position. Then he told me he was going to check me during my next contraction. I was pretty busy concentrating on the task at hand. My contraction started, he started to check me, I pushed, and the baby flew out and landed on the bed. Landed. On. The. Bed. He told me to turn over and take my baby. All of a sudden, I had this beautiful baby boy on my chest, still attached to his placenta, and I had done it. I had some bleeding issues after, but I delivered the placenta and then his cord was cut. The hospital we delivered at is excellent about the "magic hour." Essentially, a full hour of uninterrupted skin-to-skin time where mom is able to establish a bond and begin nursing. It was awesome, and was such a beautiful time for us as a family. Baby C was a champ, and passed all of his tests with flying colors. He ended up nursing past the hour, and we just did all of his checks on my chest.

I am so grateful for all of the support I had. My husband who went to all of the classes, practiced our labor techniques, and wrangled our other two while I took endless baths. My doula who prayed for us, taught us, coached us, and provided us with awesome information. My OB, who answered our incessant questions, provided us with options, and was just a great support. Best quote from him, "I'm just here to help catch your baby!" Finally, our awesome nurses. Y'all our nurses were awesome. From cheering us on for our natural VBA2C, to our skin-to-skin, and then helping us establish nursing. Everyone was integral to our delivery.

I Dropped Off the Bandwagon...

So, I dropped off the Whole 30 bandwagon :( It wasn't because I didn't want to keep going, but because we financially could not swing it this month. Whole 30 can be pricey when you are used to supplementing a lot of your meals with rice and beans. So, I went to the store and bought a big thing of rice and beans, and we have a lot of fresh fruits and veggies. Our freezer had quite a bit of meat (ground venison, chicken breasts, a small roast, and a whole turkey). So we are continuing our journey with just being aware of what we are eating and how much. There's no need for us to gorge or eat a ton of sugar. 

Here is where I should update you that are middle child has been diagnosed with Celiac disease. We have been living gluten free with him for just under a year. It is amazing how much has changed with him since his diagnosis. He gained weight and started speaking more. His gut started healing, and he was no longer in pain. We love that little guy, and are so grateful that we can help him understand everyday how to make good decisions that won't hurt his body. Now, it hasn't all been easy. Each and every day is new and hard sometimes, but he is now to the point where he asks if he can eat whatever is there. Our house is a sanctuary. Everything (except for the parental's hidden stash) is available and safe. 

This past year we also welcomed a new little boy to our folds. Meet baby C!

He is a chunk. He really is just such a sweet little boy who loves to cuddle, eat, and laugh at his brothers. He joined us May 25 very quickly, and he has just been along for the ride ever since. I will share his birth story at another time, but let's leave it with the word empowering. 

Back to food. I love it, and I love throwing things together for dinner. The other night I had some chicken thighs that needed to be cooked up. I sprinkled some salt, pepper, and garlic powder on them and seared them in some coconut oil. Once they were browned on both sides I poured some organic salsa that I got from Sam's on the top of each one and then squeezed half of a lime on top. Next I turned down the heat and let them simmer and finish cooking the meat the rest of the way. While they were cooking, I made some sweet potatoes and a batch of rice. We also had a nice salad with homemade dressing.

So, there it is. I've talked health, diets, babies, and food. Next post I'll breach the topic of BIRTH! So exciting!

A Nursing Mom's Whole 30 Journey: Days 1 & 2

Whole 30. What is it? What is it for? Why? How come? So many questions. Here is a quick summary from the Whole 30 site:

Cut out all the psychologically unhealthy, hormone-unbalancing, gut-disrupting, inflammatory food groups for a full 30 days. Let your body heal and recover from whatever effects those foods may be causing. Push the “reset” button with your metabolism, systemic inflammation, and the downstream effects of the food choices you’ve been making. Learn once and for all how the foods you’ve been eating are actually affecting your day to day life, and your long term health. The most important reason to keep reading? - See more at: http://whole30.com/whole30-program-rules/#sthash.Gz9t3Euy.dpuf

I need this. I need it desperately. I am currently overweight, nursing a 7 month old, and chasing a two year old and a five year old around. I have low energy, low self-esteem, and my gut has not been the same since I had my last child. Each pregnancy has taken its toll on my body, and now it's time to change things. So, here it is. My daily struggles, accomplishments, stumbles, meals, frustrations. 

If you would like to learn more about Whole 30 I highly encourage you to buy the book and visit their website: www.whole30.com

DAY 1: 

    To be perfectly honest, day 1 was amazing. I drank a ton of water, ate great, worked out, and accomplished homeschooling. Some of my favorite things to eat for breakfast is sauteed veggies (onion, mushroom, greens), scrambled eggs, and to top it with avocado. It's very filling, and has been a great way to start my day. Lunch was leftover sweet potato chili. For dinner I made beef stew, and ate a large green salad with it. Along with my Whole 30 I've started the Bikini Body Mommy challenge. Throughout all of this I have an excellent group of women who are also going through Whole 30. It is amazing to have support and to be able to lend support. 

DAY 2:

     No cheating today! Yay! I so, so, so wanted to cheat. I left the house for the first time today in about three days, and it would have been so nice to stop at Starbucks and get a sugary drink. Today was a day of having a slight headache and not enough water at first. They say these days are normal, and to soldier on. I pressed play on my workout. Today and yesterday I noticed that the baby has been nursing more and getting frustrated, especially at night. I'm not sure if it's just my body detoxing and trying to get used to the difference in carbs or because it is especially dry in my house (probably both). Coconut oil has definitely been a must during this time to make sure I'm getting enough fat to help keep me full and keep up milk production. 

My Thoughts on the Supreme Court Ruling Regarding State Banning of Same-Sex Marriages, and the Conservative Church's Backlash.

I have written a hundred updates in my head, and scrapped them over and over. I want to be heard as a yell into the cacophonous  void. I only have so many times to speak my piece, I want it to matter. So first I'll talk political than spiritual.

In the least surprising turn of events imaginable, the Supreme Court deemed the ban of same-sex marriages on the state level unconstitutional. The majority opinion was sloppy, the dissenting opinions caustic and divided, and the justifications used were messy and easily open to further interpretation. I think the better route would have been Amendment 9, Amendment 14, Amendment 1, and a dash of Nullification Crisis related materials added for good measure. With that being said, I think it was the right decision to make. There is not a scenario I can think of where marginalizing a particular minority segment of the population with the approval of the religious establishment was moral or beneficial at any point within history for any nation I can think of.  Here, the government takes the life (money is time is life-segments, see movie In Time for an awesome elaboration on this idea) and some liberties of all of it's citizens, of any orientation, ethnicity, culture, age. Consequently, it is obligated to attend to each citizen's well-being to the best of it's ability by virtue of social contract. This is the fundamental  conception our political system was founded upon.

Act Like Men 2014: it's complicated, is what I'm saying.

This past month I had the privilege of attending the Act Like Men conference in Fort Worth, TX due to the generosity of an anonymous church member. It was a whirlwind weekend, and stirred up a lot in me. I’ve had some time to think about what I experienced, and sort through it. Since I had some strong feelings, I felt I should share with you, o anonymous internet reader! While there was much that I enjoyed, there was some that tripped me up and really just rubbed me the wrong way. So I'll start with that, since chronologically it is first, and go from there in what may be a 3-part series. Maybe. This may not be entirely organized and polished, but this is a blog post not a book. I’m writing it from a more stream-of-consciousness position, and will likely perform endless edits. 

Our New Adventure: Wichita Falls, Oh My!

Hello world! The Scholz Klan is alive! Whoop, whoop! Here is the numbered list of what has happened this year:

1. Moved to Rockwall for Michael's last semester.
2. Michael graduated from Sam Houston State University with his Master's of Art in Clinical Psychology!
3. He interviewed A LOT!
4. Was offered a wonderful job in Wichita Falls, which we accepted!
5. Moved to Wichita Falls...whew, what a whirlwind!
6. Started work.
7. Started homeschooling the oldest...though, that is currently on hold as we are having a sick day :/
8. Joined a church yesterday!
9. Started looking at doctoral schools.

I feel like I should at a number 10 just to round it out, but I cant think of anything. We have been so incredibly blessed to be here. Michael really enjoys his job, the boys and I are having fun, and we are starting to really get into the community! What nobody told us was how family focused Wichita Falls is. Despite the awful drought that has us on very tight water restrictions the town manages to have a lot for young families. It has been really neat how integrated the AF families are with the town, as well. I should say that even though there is no H-E-B here (I know! Heresy!), I LOVE my grocery store! Haha, I know that is really random, but when you go shopping with two children, and need to get in and out quickly, this store is at the top of helpfulness. 

Well, I have got to go chase down a stinky toddler, but I will post more on what we have been doing in our adorable little cottage! 

Tata!

The Incredibly Boring Birth Story of Number Two

I essentially had the most ridiculously calm birth of our second child ever. My second birth was a scheduled csection. The area that we are in VBAC's are not supported at the local hospital. To be honest, I am perfectly content with the decision of a planned csection. My scheduled date was Friday, March 8th. My mom drove up from Fredericksburg Thursday afternoon to take care of our #1, R. M and I tried to get some sleep Thursday night, but that is practically impossible when you know you have to get up at 3:30 in the morning. We crawled out of bed as quietly as possible, and got ready. We both showered seeing as we didn't know when our next shower was going to be. I grabbed M some snacks and made him a coffee...I wasn't allowed to eat after midnight :/ (I did get my favorite restaurant for dinner Thursday night!) We got loaded up in the car, and drove the one mile to the hospital. I was super excited and perfectly at peace knowing that we were so close to meeting our little boy!

We get to the hospital and have to go in through the emergency entrance (it's about 4:25 a.m. at this point). I had previously come in to do all of the registration, but I guess the people in the emergency room hadn't gotten the paperwork. That took all of 5 minutes, and then we headed up to L&D. They already had a private room ready for me, and we went on in. Got into my hospital gown, the usual pee in a cup, and they got me all hooked up for stats and stuff. I loved that this hospital was so open to my personal requests regarding the delivery. For one, I requested that my IV be put in my arm instead of my hand. I know, I know sounds little, but that was one of the biggest things I dealt with during my last birth. Nothing hurts worse than trying to pick yourself up, and having a needle stab the crud out of your hand. They monitored and prepared me for surgery, and M and I napped on and off, joked, watch some tv, and prayed. It was a very wonderful and peaceful time between the two of us.

About 7:00, the nurses came in to wheel me down to the OR. Wow, what a different atmosphere when your surgery is something fun! When we got down to the OR it was more waiting, but my team all came in to introduce themselves. We finally got moved to the actual OR, and Michael had to wait outside while they got everything set up. I was all jittery, and a bundle of nerves and excitement. I do have to say that the spinal was some major pressure...more so than my epidural with R. The nurse that was holding me was great, and very supportive! They all talked me through each step which was wonderful. I have to say that feeling a spinal take affect was absolutely bizarre. It's like a slow tingling sensation starting in your chest and then going down to your toes, and then eventually all the feeling goes away. After the spinal was in full affect they started the csection. The whole atmosphere was great! Everyone was so excited, because we were delivering a baby on our time! The spinal put some pressure on my diaphragm, and I started to feel a little paranoid and short of breath. M came in about that time, and I asked him to pray over us and the surgery. It helped calm me down, and breath! My doctor was very talkative and told us what was going on. When it was time to deliver little L they pulled the blanket down a little to where we could watch the delivery. It was an awesome experience getting to watch him being pulled out! At 8:03 on 03/08, my beautiful baby boy was born! He had the sweetest cry! The nurses brought M over for then cleaning up, and cutting of the cord while the doctor started working on sewing me up. M brought baby L over so that I could see him and touch him. Then they got whisked upstairs for bath and stats while the doc finished with me. They moved the table up a little, and the extreme pressure I was feeling in my chest lifted immediately and I took the biggest breath!

After surgery was complete I got moved to recovery. It felt like I was in recovery forever, but it was only about 20-30 minutes. It was then that we found out that L was 7 lbs 11 oz and 20 1/2" long! They kept telling me to try and sleep, but I was too excited! Finally, I got moved up to my room, and M came in with baby L. I got to nurse, and he latched on like a little pro! About the time that we were finishing up my mom and R came in and we got to introduce the two brothers. R was very concerned about my big booboo, but he was enamored with L. My heart swelled with pride watching this growing relationship between brothers. My recovery that day was a little rough. Every four hours I started feeling nauseous, and I would end up throwing up any fluid I had in my stomach. Eventually, everything got better, and I was up and ready to walk the next morning. The nurses did not expect me to be ready to take a shower Saturday morning, but I was chomping at the bit to get going. I showered while M slept, and I got to put on a little makeup and put some clean clothes on. M's family came in that day, and came up to meet baby L. It was great to see everyone, and I'm happy that we decided to wait to have visitors until the next day. It would have been pretty difficult seeing everyone through the puking.

We went home Sunday afternoon, and R was so happy to have us all home. The recovery this time was a heck of a lot easier this time around, and so was nursing. It was so nice to have my mom with us during that first week home. I am so thankful for the love and peace that surrounded us during that time. It made everything so pleasant, and such a blessing.

Presenting our number 2, Baby L! Hasn't even had his first bath yet!